Yes! to Success!

Okay...so yesterday was a success...it went pretty much as planned......I went to the gym, got in a good work out and a good session in the steam room, then I met L and we had lunch at Chipotle.  By the time we got there I was very hungry.  I had only eaten an apple, and maybe a bit of green smoothie, and then had gone to the gym.  I had my favorite veggie fajita bowl, with no rice, a very little bit of pinto beans, some fresh salsa, some hot salsa, some corn salsa, some guacamole with lettuce.  And a bag of chips.  That was yum.  Then later I went over to my friend's house to do some full moon drumming but really more to talk....and I had a great time, then came home, hung out with L a it and then we went to bed.  The moon is full and beautiful.

And today, today I haven't even gotten out of my pajamas, which doesn't mean I haven't done anything, actually I've done a fair bit....but I didn't have a plan...didn't need to make one, I knew what I needed to do.  I went to the Soulful Woman Certficate Program and looked over all of the calls, the special recordings (meditations, Ariel Spilsbury, Angeles Arrien,etc) and the all of the handouts and downloaded to my desktop so they will be easily accessible.  And I listened to a great meditation by Ariel Spilsbury...I should listen to it daily.

I listened to the rest of the Manifest Everything Now call by Debra Poneman about her program, Yes! to Success.......and then I bought her program....and now I am listening to the recordings....and I got a big slap in the face....a big wake up splash of cold water.......as she said that this is what you need to do to transition to doing what you love to do.......and that is to go to your job, give it your all, do your best, because as the Maharishi Yoga said.....you need to deserve, then you can desire....you need to go to your work and do the most fabulous job, ask yourself, "What can I do to increase my service today...how can I contribute, how can I make this work place happier, more harmonious, more full of love?  "if you want greater rewards, perform greater service and the rewards will always come, because life is like a big apothecary scale with one bowl marked service and the other bowl marked rewards and  the more you put in the bowl marked service, life will reward you in the bowl marked rewards."   This made me start, as because I hadn't done that, at least not fully and completely. I know that, but I was wanting out, and I just wasn't sure how to do it as I didn't have a plan B.  I am working on developing a plan b, but the universe decided I was taking too long (and I was) and just threw me into the pool. 

But regardless of that situation, hearing Debra speak made me realize that I need to show up.  In my life.  At work, at home, everywhere.....and the reasons why I don't show up......well...they are there...and while I have been working on releasing emotions that I don't want to keep (worry, anxiety, fear, feeling of worthlessness, not being up to the task, etc) and I have been doing pretty good with that...I want to actually work on it much more once I get all of the materials...I need to show up.  That is my goal.  To make every day a conscious day, of working towards what I want.  And of doing my best in all parts of my life.  I am trying.  I am working it.  I think I did pretty well today.....I am happy with today.  And, I made cookies with my teenage son....he did about half of the work, and the cookies turned out quite well.  We made cut out cookies, using all of our cookie cutters....the starfish, the snowflake, the bat, the rhino, the saguaro, the jalapeno, the snowman, the 3 different kinds of Christmas trees, the stars, etc.  He asked if we could make chocolate chip cookies but since I had in mind cut out cookies and we didn't have any chocolate chips, we just made chocolate roll out cookies and flavored them with cocoa powder, cinnamon, almond extract, vanilla extract and a dash of brandy.  They are yum.  I am not eating anymore tonight, but just may have to hide some to make sure I get my share.

And today I had a green smoothie for breakfast, 2 large Cameo apples, 2 slices of sprouted grain toast with mayonnaise, a quinoa burger, 2 campari tomatoes slices, with some hot sauce, (this is my sandwich) and some spinach salad.  Later I had some cookie dough and some of the cookies...all made with the best ingredients (seriously, organic flour, coconut sugar, cane sugar, butter, eggs) all high quality...and we used about half of the sugar the receipe calls for...and since then....hmm..oh yes, I also had some of my tulsi, holy basil powder...I think I should take a bit less....but I can tell it does have a good effect.  And now I have to figure out what to have for dinner...everyone else is making homemade pizzas but while I may eat a slice or two...I really need to eat something else.  I think I might make a banana smoothie with some fresh bananas, frozen raspberries and mango and fresh kiwi.  With some canned coconut water, and some of my NuDe Nutrient Dense Acai protein powder...then we are going to watch a movie.

Tomorrow...what am I going to do tomorrow?  I need to start writing.  I need to make a plan, have a goal, a lofty goal, one that excites me, as well as little ones, like doing the writing, going to the gym again, wrapping Barb et al's presents, doing something to clean the house, maybe just clean one room, and listen to more of the Yes!to Sucess! recordings.

The plan is to maintain that Dalai Lama state of mind, that state of joy, that state of bliss...to just call it forth, to just own it, do it, be it...do everything with joy and love............that is my goal for tomorrow...to accomplish all of the above while maintaining a serene, calm, happy, joyful, state of mind.  all of the time, no matter what.....because when I do...miracles happen....everyday miracles, but miracles none the less and the more I practice that...and I have forgotten that today, I have been in a good space but not the dalai lama state of mind...that sustained serene,joyful state of mind.........here I go now...........this is my practice....

Transformation Still In Progress

I am still working on transformation and still running into blocks but I have new tools.  I have raw foods and juicing, fasting and veganism, I have the Soulful Woman's Certificate Program which is a 9 month program....but the clock is ticking...I need to make more use of it....I have the Crack Your Egg Program which has been very helpful but I don't think I can work it all the way through,.....and it is a very good program and an important piece of the puzzle, but I think I still need more pieces.  I also have the Life Work Compass Program, the Dream Weavers or some such program (about working with your actual dreams, but mine are hiding from me....) I have the Qi Gong Course, the Miracle Morning, the Manifest Everything Now webinars, the Belief Buster Kit from Aine (enya) Belton, Notes from the Universe, Mike Dooley's "Leveraging the Universe", and "Infinite Possibilities", Evelyn Lim's Life Vison Mastery, Christopher Tims, Tom Lescher "New Paradigm Astrology", I have my Dalai Lama state of mind, all of my books, I have lots of stuff....and last but not least I have the "Emotion Codes", which is another big piece of the puzzle, and I have met some great new friends....just perfect for me for where I am in my life right now..I am manifesting friends, and information and this just in......the Universe has just pushed me into the deep end of the pool.......as, get this....on 12-21-12 around (seriously this is very close to the exact time) 12:21 pm, I lost my job.  It was taken away.  No longer exists.   While this was actually not a huge surprise (as I can read the writing on the wall)....they had been taking pieces of my job away from me, gradually, over time, no wonder I kept kicking up a big fit, as on one level, I must have known.  Then I surrendered, and the end, when it did come, was peaceful.  I shed a few tears, made a sarcastic remark or two, but basically, I accepted reality, and even embraced it, as truth be told, I did not want the job, had not wanted it for quite a long time, I was leaning into the cutting of ties, and embracing was and remains the best course of action.

Of course, I have yet to burst this bubble of reality for my family......as it was just before Christmas, and why ruin everyone's Christmas, including my own...I am trying to envision a scenario in which my husband does not freak out, stress out, stress me out...where like Mr. Magoo, I walk blindly yet confidently off the end of the beam, and lo and behold, another beam appears out of nowhere and I do not fall........but continue merrily on my way.  I can do this....but convincing my husband of this in another thing...he does not believe in infinite possibilities.....so am preparing myself to not be affected by his lack of belief, and am also paving the way for the next awesome reality to be mine.  Working it.........and I really need as much time as possible for this to me so.............still working out the details.

So, I will be blogging on this regularly....my brilliant thoughts for yesterday was that to live an extraordinary life, I need to do extraordinary things, and for me that includes eating a 100% raw diet....not a reality today....working the Miracle Morning....(I am so not a morning person....I really 'wake up' no earlier than 10 am, preferably closer to noon, beginning my day with a bit of meditation so I go into my day 'conscious'.....with forethought.............with a blue print of how I want my day to go.........and I must work my programs, the Soulful Woman Program is a big big deal, a big big help but I have to participate, do the work, show up for it....and all the rest of the things that I have.....some are good foundations, no longer needed to be worked, but having gotten the gist of them into my programming, they have done their good, but others need further work and exploration.....I have ordered the "Emotion Code" program and am waiting to the cd's and Emotion Chart etc to arrive....and really need to work that program....and or find a practioner to work on my releasing my trapped emotions with me, but I really would love it if I could do it mostly myself.  I had an iridology reading, the main thing I got out of it is that she could see all of the colon cleansing, juice fasting that I had done...that I have actually done my colon alot of good....must keep up the good work.  Other than that she didn't tell me anything I don't know already....she did suggest I cut out overt sugars and wheat from my diet...still working on that.....esp with the wheat.  I like my sprouted grain toast.

So, I am actually quite excited and exhilarated to see what my future brings......in my old life, it was definitely a case of being a square peg in a round hole...not exactly a fit...........and I really don't want to be that again..I am going to find the proper fit for me....and I have a much better idea of what that is....especially as I do need a real job whilst I finally and fully bloom into the real me..........

I have started wearing 'goddess' dress alot more............with my goddess necklaces..my tibetan piece, my amethyst, my turquoise, my beads............being myself more fully in my everyday life....

Tomorrow I hope to attend a full moon drumming ceremony,....hoping it is not outside yet it would be best if it were but it has gotten so very cold here now, at the tail end of December....frosty cold...hopefully there will be a very large bonfire...........and I will dress warmly and bring my new drum which is lovely.....and tomorrow morning (sometime...but not too late....) I am going to the gym, to work out, followed by a lovely session in the steam room, and then hopefully a lunch date with my husband, followed by working on my Soulful Women course...listening to the meditations on the Mystic, etc., participating in the various topics and posts on the forum.....that is my blueprint for tomorrow........and here it ends....bon soir, bon nuit, bon reves.

Ciao bellas!